Priorities Shift....

OK I just wanted to write something about this, because I realize that some of you may remember that last August I thought sitting on the couch watching Olympics was a pretty fun activity to do while 8 months pregnant. I'd just gotten my strength back after a nasty stomach flu, had returned from a fun trip to Canada, and lots of things in life seemed to be going well at that time. And I was inexplicably fascinated by the women marathon category that night, and vowed to run in my own marathon within a year of the baby birth.

I am gonna put in some pictures of Ben here, because its pertinent and because it makes me happy to see him.





Another thing falling into place at the time was the well-being of Mike's sweet beloved nephew Ben. He was almost 6 months old at that time, and his life full of medical challenges seemed to be calming down recently. He would have had a life full of surgeries and procedures ahead, but he seemed to be stable for those last several weeks. Also, because of some issues his parents have, Ben was in state custody but his parents had consented to allow an adoption to proceed which would place him in a good home with another relative. His well being was one of the main reasons for my contentment at this time. Everything was working out for Ben and I was so so glad. It made me feel cheery and optimistic and ambitious enough to think,"I could totally do this! I'm gonna run/walk a marathon! If Ben can go through all those surgeries and will have more, I can do a measly marathon! "

5 days later was August 21st, the night Ben died at Primary Children Hospital. Mike and I truly did love him as much as if he were our own child, so it was devastating. I had just begun to think I could move past it and be ok someday, and then Grant was born, "granted" to help us all feel better and deal with our recent loss.

We adore Grant and although I miss Ben daily, Grant has helped us to heal from this loss. However, as if a newborn does not just turn your life upside down enough naturally, there were all Grant's health issues we've dealt with since his birth. Very very minor ones compared to what sweet baby Ben went through and would have gone through but still challenging. Moving to CA for a month, being away from Lincoln and Mike.... well I don't need to rehash all of that. It's been tough but its been settling down into a new kind of normal for us. And we are happy together at home here, and busy and so grateful Grant is still healthy!

With all the stress eating I've had to do to remain functional since then, I've put on some weight and been doing the opposite of what a person doing a marathon would do. However I have been working out lately so I'm not entirely gross and out of shape, just kinda. :) So I'm changing it, I walked a 5K when Grant was 6 weeks old and thought I was gonna die! Before Grant's birthday I'm gonna do another one and not feel like dying. And I'll walk/run a marathon before 30 years old. That gives me a few more years to prepare.

Another goal I've set as my goals have shifted is to do a fitting tribute for my special boy Ben. Actually nothing on this earth could express how much he meant to me, but I have taken on a project nonetheless. Bought a 50% off prelit Christmas tree @Walmart right before I left for Vegas in December. I'm going to decorate it and donate it to Primary Children's Festival of Trees. I haven't gotten far on it yet, but it's gonna be awesome! And take a lot of my time until the beginning of December. It'll be worth it!

So that's what's going on here, busyness and reprioritizing. And here don't say I never take/post pictures of my cute boys because these are from the beginning of May and now here they are on my blog. So there! ;)